Getting your child into a good school to receive a great education is very important for most parents. Some parents will do whatever they can to get their child into a certain school with a good reputation. That is why some parents will push their child to the limit to be a high achiever. Not only do some parents push their children in education, they also push them to be competitive winners in beauty pageants, acting careers, and sporting events.

Pushing children to be the very best they can be is nothing new. In the biblical stories of Sampson and Delilah, Paul’s letters to Timothy, Jacob and his amazingly colorful coat, all these children were shown favor by their parents and encouraged to do better than the average person.

Gently pushing or encouraging children to be their best should be a part of the discipline process. As parents, it is important to guide children towards activities that build self-esteem, self-reliance, self-expression, and self-belief. Parents should encourage children once they enter a task to complete the task to its finish. Education and activities should be fun, and the child should have a passion for learning and the outcomes should be positive for both child and parent.

Parents must feel good about who they are before entering a child into pageants, acting classes, advanced educational classes, or extracurricular sports teams. Children must feel good about who they are as well. They must feel happy and confident before entering a new adventure.

If the child complains constantly about the activity, perhaps the child should not participate in the activity. A frustrated child will create a frustrated parent. Therefore, reconsideration should be given to the activity.

There have been instances when a parent requested that their child be tested by the school psychologist for entry into the gifted program. Once the results of the test returned unfavorable for the child (above average but not gifted), the parent hired an outside psychologist to re-test the child until the results became favorable for the gifted program.

Parents should never place their child in harm’s way if the activity could potentially cause physical or emotional stress for the child. This could also include parents who may be extremely jealous of another child’s competence and may want to cause hurt or pain to another child to keep them out of the competition. There have been cases when one parent made death threats to another child trying out for the same cheering squad. Also, there have been cases when over-zealous fathers used profane language towards other children for tackling his son on the peewee football team during a game. As a parent, you would want to avoid conflict such as this. Your child’s participation in this type of environment is not worth the pain it may cause. The environment should be nurturing, positive, and fun.

If the child happens to be good at a particular activity, make sure the child is not only defined by the activity, such as only as a beauty queen, child actor, or an athlete. There must be a balance of activities in the child’s life to help the child mature into a well-rounded individual.

Positive pushing is a good thing. The lines of communication between parent and child should be open and unambiguous. So, before you enter your child into that contest, event, or class, make sure you have a clear understanding of the expectations for you and the child. That it is something to fulfill your child’s dreams and not yours, that the experience will be positive for both you and your child, and more importantly, that it will be fun for everyone.

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Tags: Family Fun, Healthy Living, Lifestyle